Heading for a new future?


It has been one and a half year since my last post, since my Life passed away.
Many things happened these past 18 months, huge disappointments and a very few, unexpected, pleasant surprises. People letting me down big time and a very few, that stood by me; the bitter and the sweet both unexpected ... It hurt me almost as much as losing my Life.
And no matter what you may read or hear elsewhere, She was MY Life, nobody else’s.

When i finally was kind of ready to open myself up to new emotions a new Mistress found me. Things went smoothly between the two of us and I was to be collared in a ceremony. She told me to make an invitation for my collaring ceremony; we expected many guests.
So she could see what buildings skills I have, she ordered me to build something (no matter what) that should be given to her at the ceremony. I built a deep dark red heart, that rotates within a collar. I choose to create something symbolic instead of the things I usually create, like houses and book(lets)/ cards.



Lizzie's collared heart

 
To make a long story short three days before the ceremony she canceled the whole thing, more specific her Mistress did so in her name in a very cruel way. Besides the fact that the way this all came down showed what they really were i felt abused and badly hurt; my emotional balance appeared to be more fragile then i had realized.
When i told my sweet sis about this i had to forcefully keep her from going there and give them a piece of her mind, something that is so not like her *smiles*.
The collared heart, by the way,  is placed at the landing point of the Lovers Playground by another friend of mine; I guess she must like it … I like her; she is a real snoesje :-)
Apparently my sister told her wife and Mistress, my best friend in SL. This lead us to have a long talk with a surprising twist: it ended in her turning into Her. She told me She wanted to own me for quite some time already, a feeling She always kept to Herself very securely: after all i was married and owned and She respects my Life/ Mistress very much.
Anyway I never even suspected the tiniest bit, so i was completely surprised, in particular since She is my best friend. One should think one does know each other pretty well. We talked about the pro's and cons and our fears and ... and ... and … and W/we decided to go into trial. My best friend became my Owner.
It wasn’t the easiest choice since She needs to be away for her job very often; being away very long periods; still i am most happy with my decision to submit to Her.
She has been away since midst August and did not return until now. No need to say, that Her return makes this Christmas very special for both my sis and me.
I am really looking forward to the upcoming months, spending time with Her. I really need this since my life (talking about the second one, not the first) over all has not been very happy since Annemie lost her battle against cancer: I’ve been very lonely and less and less motivated doing stuff, learning new things finding myself staying offline more and more. If it wasn't for my sis and two friends i probably would have left this life. Of course the chat sessions with Mistress (yes, She was able to chat this very long trip) did help too ... a great deal for that matter.
During these talks Mistress suggested this may be a good time to move on, leave the past behind and head for the future. Now She has returned i guess W/we will talk about the options we have.
Considering all that has (not) happened in the past, considering Her return, considering the start of a new year it may be time to move on indeed.
I will keep you all posted.

Picture "Graving" taken by Aidan Aura